MEAT TO THE BEAT

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Success Isn't measured In dollars and cents. Success Is measured In your mlnd.

-MeatLoaf

AUSTIN, TX—Talk about incongruity. Here we are speeding down a Texas highway, sun blazing overhead. Were in a van, naturally—the only way to travel here—and we couldnt be a more unlikely group of passengers. In the front sits a Mexican-American Teamster, smiling, happy to be driving us around. Next to him is Blondies Jimmy Destri, looking out the window and laughing at hand-scrawled signs promising "TURKEY SHOOT THURSDAY." In the back seat, lead guitarist Chris Stein fiddles with his grey cowboy hat and looks closely at my beatenbut-still-functioning cassette recorder. At his right sits this lonely Detroit boy, representing CREEM and recovering from heavy night of Texas-style beverage consuming.

And were on our way to Montgomery Wards. To buy a gun.

Were all here to be a part of Roadie, a United Artists film being shot in Austin with a projected release date of Summer 1980. Incongruities once again: the cast features Meat Loaf, Art Carney, Blondie, Alice Cooper, Roy Orbison, Hank Williams, Jr., even Don Cornelius, and more. Even less likely, this film is supposed to be serious— Smokey and the bandit wont be showing up, in other words—and considering the director involved, serious it will likely be. Alan Rudolph, protege of Robert Altman and director of Welcome To L.A. and Remember My Name, is the man assigned the unenviable task of making the whole thing cohesive. How hes going to do it remains a mystery. Deep down inside, I have the feeling that somebody someplace is going to end up throwing the whole thing against the wall and hoping it sticks.

Roadie is the story of Travis W. Redfish, described somewhere in my notes as "an energetic, hell-raising, beer truck-driving Texan wbo thinks Rolling Stones are large, rotating pebbles." Honest. Travis, played by the honorable Mr. Loaf, falls for a hot-totrot groupie named Lola Bouillabaise (Kaki Hunter); eventually she coerces him into joining Mohammed Johnsons Rock & Roll Circus. Mr. Mohammed is actually Soul Train refugee Don Cornelius, and its at this juncture Roadie becomes incomprehensible to the untrained eye. Travis is apparently a mechanical genius, Blondie is apparently the band for which Travis roadies, and Roadie will apparently make a lot more sense when its on the screen this summer.

DAY OF ARRIVAL: A driver at the Austin airport takes me to the Stephen F. Austin Hotel, conveniently situated in the heart of this university/capitolcity right next to a Dunkin Donuts and Woolworths department store. Met there by the films publicists, we eventually join a small party of waiting journalists and photographers.

Soon were taken by van to a race track 20 minutes out of the city, the shooting location for the tliree days were scheduled to be there.

The race track is surrounded by police cars and several guards, functioning mainly to keep curiosity seekers away from the set. We leave the van and walk toward a cluster of one hundred to one hundred fifty people. All are gathered around several movie cameras. Facing the cameras ar^ Meat Loaf, various members of Blondie, and some of the hottest-to-trottest female extras this Detroit boy has ever seen.

While we sit and watch, the crew attempts to shoot a single scene maybe 11 or 12 times, an extremely boring,, meticulous process. In this particular scene, cast members shovel horse shit into a blazing fire —truly a meaningful gesture—and it all ends with Debbie Harry planting a wet one of Meat Loafs kisser. By nature a symbolist, this writer decides to explore the race track.

INSIDE THE TRAILER: While Blondie plays Johnny Cashs "Ring Of Fire" on the stage outside, Meat Loaf and I sit inside a nearby trailer and discuss .the meaning of life. Meats wearing your standard Rory Gallagher flannel shirt and a big white cowboy hat; hes also chewing a lot of gum. Major lesson of the day: when they make movies, you have to wait around a lot. He chews his gum and smiles.

, Meat, I ask, are you playing the part of Travis Redfish right now, even as we speak?

"Yeah," he chews, smiling. He looks out the trailer window toward the stage. "Of course I am. Have been since August. You know—chewin gum. I started chewin gum in August. Travis chews gum all the time. Certain moments he talks and it hangs out the side of this mouth." He illustrates. "Its sorta classic, sorta my Ted Nugent pose, ya know?"

Well, I continue, would you consider this Travis character to be smarter or dumber than the real Meat Loaf we know and love?

No hesitation. "Travis is supposed to be a mechanical genius, so hes much smarter. Especially as far as mechanics, and how things work." Meat shakes his head. "I dont know anything about that. Travis can fix anything. My little girl, Pearl, shes four. She asked me, “Daddy, can you fix this? I said “I dunno and she said “Travis Redfish can fix anything? So then I started fixing things around the house." Satisfied, he looks out the window again. "Its called method acting."

I think that real rock fans know who we are, and they don't really need an explanation.

-Debbie Harry

Outside, Blondie play "Ring Of Fire" for the fourth time, maybe the fifth.

INSIDE THE VAN: Chris Stein, Jimmy Destri, the driver and I leave the set during a lunch break. Were looking for a sporting goods store. Because the band is on call, the union requires Blondie to be on the set regardless of whether the scene theyre needed for is actually shot. It gets very boring waiting around. Chris—who assures me that hes a peace-loving boy from Brooklyn—wants to get a pellet gun. Its for target practice, he says. For when the band sits around With nothing to do.

Stein and Destri are open and talkative; they may be a little bored too, but from all indications theyre happy to be in the film. We talk about music, the press, the differences between England and America, the bands future plans, and the usual.

I bring up an old Chris Stein quote I read somewhere: "I really admire Andy Warhol, because he manipulated the media. I think thats the hippest thing you can do." I ask Chris about it.

"Yeah." He shrugs. "That was grossly blown out of context and proportion. I never meant that in the sense that we want to control the people that write about us. I certainly dont care what people write about us as long as it isnt idiotic or totally moronic.

"Like that last CREEM story on Debbie." (to those unaware, Nick Tosches fab interview in CREEM, June 79, featuring tuna fish, leg shaving, and piss-on-hisfingers) "I really thought that was funny and I likedit. Some of the people at our press office were horrified, but hey, we liked it. Debbie liked it. I liked the piece, cause it was like a satire of all those dumb interviews that she always does, you know? But it was done on a conscious level."

Up front, Destri voices his agreement.

"Its almost impossible to color what people write about you," Stein continues, "but its always a lot easier for inaccuracy to appear in print. Like a guy can quote you and leave out one word, and thatll be enough. Hell be quoting you out of good faith, but just leaving put the one word will take the meaning out of what you said."

The van zooms toward the outskirts of Austin. We look for likely gun shops.

"No," Stein says, “Hhe media is there to be controlled. Thats what I meant by that—that its there to be manipulated. Thats what its for. If you didnt give the media stuff to write about, or make films about, whatd they be doin? Nothin. Nobody would have a job."

SHOWTIME: On the second day, Blondie performs before an audience of Austin kids. All were given free tickets through a radio and record store promotion. The race track slowly fills with curious townies, all dressed to their Texan hilt with leather boots and vests. A sign greets them at the race track entrance: BY ATTENDING THIS CONCERT YOU ARE GRANTING US PERMISSION TO PHOTOGRAPH YOU.

A member of the film crew emerges onstage. He explains to the audience that theyre actually to be a part of this film. Theres much applause. Please be patient; he announces, this might take a while. Minutes later, Blondie cheerfully greets the crowd.'They run through "Dreaming," "Ring Of Fire," and "One Way Or Another." Everyones in fine form; the audience loves it. As the film crewman had explained, the band leaves after their third song. The audience calls for more. Next up: the Standing Waves, an Austin-based band that owes more than a little to the Talking Heads. They manage a respectable set nonetheless.

A friend points out Roky Erickson, late of the Thirteenth-Floor Elevators, standing in the audience. I strollon over to say“hello.

INSIDE THE TRAILER: Curious, I ask Meat Loaf about the status of Bat Out Of Heirs follow-up, an LP supposedly due last June. Id heard things werent quite working smoothly.

Meat Loaf continues chewing and turns in his chair. "There were just a lot of problems, ya know? I had problems with my voice, I had problems because Id toured so long—it Was just all crazy"

Any long-term health problems?

"I sure to hell hope not."

Outside, Blondie continues with still another "Ring Of Fire." Its getting monotonous.

Meat considers. "Because I was fine, I was in the middle of doing some vocals, and when I went back to redo em, I couldnt sing. I didnt know what it was—I went to a hypnotist and a psychologist and all kinds of shit. All the tracks are done, all the background is done, half the vocals are done." He shakes his head gloomily. "I just couldnt finish it. I dunno, there may even be songs I have mental blocks about at this point. I got one called “Stark Raving Love that I dont think I can ever sing. I mean its an incredible song and all—I just dont think Ill be able to sing it..."

Why?

"Why? I dont know why!" He gestures outside the trailer. "Thats what they wanna know, thats what they ask me. They called me last night: “Listen, what are we gonna do about this?—I dunno, I told em, Im doin a movie, gimme a break!"

The media is there to be controlled.

—Chris Stein

He looks outside the trailer again. "I dont know—its like I fought with it, ya know? I wasnt around for the creation of it when it happened. For all of Bat, well, wecreated it all together—and the title song for this one, too, “Bad For Good, we created it all together. But theres some on this record that werent createcf together, that we didnt finish. And all of a sudden heres Bittan and all those guys from Springsteens band, and theyre recording the tunes, and Im walkin in saying, “Well, whatre.ya doin? and they say “Were doing "Stark Raving Love" and" I said “Never heard it before... And it got too weird..." i

INSIDE THE DRESSING ROOM: Clem Burke and Frank Infante are utterly bored, on call for the day and waiting for something, anything exciting to happen. And nothing will. Members of the film crew and a small security staff walk around the room looking at each other. Outside Meat Loaf screams his tenth Travis Redfish yell of the day. The waiting is getting dreary.

We sit down at the table. I ask them how theyd compare yesterdays performance in front of the Austin audience with todays complete boredom.

Infante grins. "That was the best. When we played those first three songs, that was the best time Ive had since weve been here. Like playing, actually playing without having to think about whether were gonna have to do it again 20 million times, or tryin to think about cameras and all that shit. Just playin and not thinkin about nothin, man—that was the best feelin I had since I got here.

"I think its just the hanging around and the boredom, man. It just gets ya pissed off. You get real irritable when ya gotta sit around all day doing nothing..."

"Actually," Burke leans over, "we told them to get us six Space Invaders games, which I really didnt think would be that hard to do. A couple of dirt bikes and some Space Invaders games. Im surprised they didnt—especially because we have to be here every day..."

Jimmy Destri walks up to the dressing room, Nigel Harrison steps in for a moment, and outside Meat Loaf is still screaming. A member of the film crew looks at his watch. Someone asks where the new television is.

SHOWTIME: Empty plastic cups ing scribed with the word "Budweiser" are « passed out among the audience. A film 5 crewman instructs audience members to z raise them above their heads. Gonna be a great effect, theyre told. So the cups are raised.

N Soon the boredom becomes contagious. Don Cornelius struts onstage and runs through his rap while the cameras shoot away. The audience, instructed to give Mr. Soul Train a lukewarm reception, bombard him with their Budweiser cups en masse, plus bonus beer cans. Which bothers Cornelius greatly. After the shot, he returns onstage and announces ominously, "If I find out whos throwing all the fucking cans up here, were gonna get together later."

The audience is unsympathetic.

INSIDE THE VAN: We discuss the trappings of success, Chris Stein, Jimmy Destri, and I. What would they be doing right now if they could be doing anything they wanted to? Destri ponders.

"I dont know," he says. "I think on the musical level wed probably be doing more research into the tangents that have popped up along the line so far..."

You mean stuff like "Fade Away And Radiate" with Robert Fripp?

"No. Not necessarily that. Things that by association we got into..."

"Oh," Stein says, "you mean like the control of bodily functions through sound..."

Destri nods. "Yeah, thats one thing, research into that, research into audiophysics, research into television—Fd like this group to become a media corporation, I really would. Because theres probably more brains jfor that in this band than any other band around. I mean two art school dropouts, three fashion-conscious young men, and Debbie—theres probably enough resources around to start a whole media corporation."

The van pulls into a shopping mall with two likely gun-shop prospects—a sporting goods store and a Montgomery Wards. Chris Stein speaks quickly:

"On the political level, one of my goals is to try to synthesize different kinds of music thatll bring people together. I definitely see a return toward R&B and soul music. I think the fuckin anti-disco movement is a bunch of bullshit with very heavy racist overtones. And if youll remember correctly, back in the late 60s, all the great black music that people now accept as the best—the Supremes and the Four Tops and all that stuff—was considered sort of the same way that disco music is considered now. People saying its just background music, but Procol Harum or whoever is really happening.

TURN TO PAGE 60

CONTINUED FROM PAGE 45

"Its exactly the same mentality, and people now realize that all that great fuckin black music is now classic. Theres a lot of great disco music, but theres a lot of Shitty, disgusting disco music. Theres also a lot of shitty rock W roll music; and I think that people should realize that if someone came out with a fuckin anti-rock n roll or anti-country music movement, people would be horrified..."

Thjngs continue to drag on. A few members of the press lingering backstage are told that some new extras are needed. Turns out that of all things, these extras are supposed to portray members of the press. One of the casting people nabs a reporter from the New York Daily News. Looking the reporter up and down, he glares at him doubtfully. "Hmmm... Were gonna have to get you in the right clothes first..."

Nobody laughs.

INSIDE THE TRAILER: Interview time with Meat Loaf is almost up. An outgoing, very friendly guy, he talks non-stop and proves impossible to dislike. How could anybody give this guy a hard time? Wondering, I ask him if he thinks hes been , given a fair shake by the press. He thinks for a minute. Then he nods his head.

"There are only two things that have ever happened," says Meat, "that have ever made me really angry. One happened in Australia when a guy asked me “when are you gonna lose weight and give us a real show? I almost killed him.

"The other one was about four days ago. I dont know whether it was in CREEM or Circus. It was in an article about Todd Rundgren by somebody named Toby—"

—Oh yeah, say I. It was in CREEM. Toby Goldstein.

"Yeah, Toby Goldstein, it was in CREEM and it was about Rundgren, it was—uhh, is Toby Goldstein a girl or a guy?"

—Uhh...a girl.

"—Yeah. Well anyway she said that before Rundgren got with me I was a “longtime loser. That really made me mad. I just wanted to know where she got her references. I mean if its true then its true, ya know? Seems like ya need references for that. And my comment is: if before Bat Out Of Hell sold nine million copies I was a longtime loser, then that means that Bruce Springsteen was a longtime loser, the Rolling Stones were longtime losers—hey, anybody but the Bee Gees and Fleetwood Mac are longtime losers, ya know? Like the Who—cause their album didnt sell nine million theyre longtime losers, right?

"I dunno, I never pictured myself as a loser. Just because I didnt have a record that sold 9 million copies didnt make me a loser. Was she a loser before she started doing articles for CREEM? Im sure she doesnt look upon herself as a loser. Its one of those—aww, I dunno, it just caught me, it struck me..."

Suddenly Meat perks up. "Hey, I did Shakespeare in Central Park, and I never read Shakespeare. To me, that was one of the biggest wins in my life. I was doin Shakespeare with these cats whove been doin Shakespeare for 20 years!" Theres a knock at the trailer door. Meat keeps talking. "I mean, this is a huge rush. If this film is a total failure, this is a winner. If it doesnt gross two dollars its a fuckin winner. Because here I am, Im doing this, Im learning..."

The door opens to Meat Loafs parting words:

"Success isnt measured in dollars and cents," he says, "success is measured in your mind..."

And its time for someone elses Meat Loaf interview.

Its almost time to leave. Chris Stein and Jimmy Destri have managed to wangle a pellet gun out of Montgomery Wards, were back at the race track, my plane to Detroit takes off in two hours—and Im still waiting to speak to Debbie Harry. Shes been tied up all day with a shot shes in, Im told. Things are truly put of the bands hands.

My ride to the airports scheduled in 15 minutes and I finally get the word: Lets do it. Now.

Im introduced to Debbie, who isnt exactly thrilled with the prospect of an interview. We walk into her dressing room.

I sit down and turn on the tape machine, anticipating the tremendously deep, meaningful interview Til get in the 10 minutes Ill be able to stay.

"Well," says Debbie. "Ask away."

Okay. Time to be non-comittal.

Does all the time you spend waiting between shots bother you at all?

"I dont think anybody really enjoys the wait," says Debbie, "its just—" Suddenly members of the band walk in, loud and oblivious to the interview.

"Hey shut up, willya?" shouts Debbie. Another minute ticks away.

Another tack. You had any other serious film offers lately?

"Nope."

Okay. If someone did offer you something good, would you consider it?

"Yeah. If I liked it, I would do it:"

Silence.

Do you think that might lead to any kind of conflict of interest between you ahd the guys in the band?

;"I dont see why. I did one movie already."

Oh yeah? Which one?

uUnion City."

Oh.

Has anything happened with that Alphaville project with Robert Fripp?

"No. Were looking for backers. Were looking for money."

Then it is still on? ,

"Well, whatever is on is on. If you can pull it off, it works."

More silence.

Four minutes left. Time for open-ended questions.

The bands increased popularity affected you personally in any way? Any way at all weird?

' "No."

Shes silent. Im silent.

"I think now its become easier. Since weve had our new management everythings become a lot easier and a lot clearer. Everybodys becoming a lot more aware of what their responsibilities are. And everybodys much happier, I think. Much more relaxed..."

Time to take advantage of this sudden rash of verbosity. I probe further.

Did you enjoy being on the cover of Us magazine?

A reaction. "I thought it was really a shitty piece of smut. Actually, I think its a cheap scandal rag. Us magazine does not stand for we." '

A brief silence. Thoughts of the airport.

Does it bother you at all that your picture is plastered in every magazine imaginable?

"I dont even think about it. Theres nothing to think about. I take it for granted now. I dunno, maybe J shouldnt, maybe I should. I dunno. If I like the picture its great, if I dont, its tasteless. What can / do?

So much for ten minutes.

Debbie, I gotta go. My plane leaves in an hour. This isnt exactly the best way to do an interview.

"Yeah,"tagrees Debbie.

Chris Stein pops up from the background. "Hes really okay, you can talk to him, Debbie.".

Debbie looks at Chris. "I wasnt not talking to him..."

1 dutifully agree. Im burned-out. I have to leave.

Then Debbie speaks, to me and to Chris:

"No, I just know that—I mean I like CREEM magazine, I just know that whatever you say, its always turned into some kinda slapstick thing. So Im just being short and lettin em do their worst with whatever I say..."

Well, I ask, why do you think that happens?

"They do it to everybody, thats their thing. I mean, Im obviously an educated consumer, right? So Im not gonna be that open, Fm not gonna be serious. Of course Im not gonna be serious with you, cause thats who youre writing for..."

In the remaining minute we discuss CREEMs merits, CREEMs faults, Japanese music and Famous Monsters of Filmland magazine.

1 stand up. Debbie adds a final word.

"This whole business about Blondie and what they are and who they are—I think that real rock fans know who we are, and they dont really need an explanation. Because they hear our records and thats it. Thats what we are to them. And thats what we are, take my word for it."

Ten minutes are up.

AINT LIFE STRANGE ADDENDUM: Made it to the airport in time to have a beer at the bar. Lost my luggage for two days, though.