THE PANTS DROP HERE
"Look! We’re still trapped in METAL, where we were forced to go through that stupid photofeature last month! Fortunately, we of Slayer know the secret exit route from this mag ...OK, drop the pants, Hanneman!" "Mein Gott! If zey can do it, vhy can't Krokus escape also from zis rag? Der pants, schnell!"
The CREEM Archive presents the magazine as originally created. Digital text has been scanned from its original print format and may contain formatting quirks and inconsistencies.
THE PANTS DROP HERE
FEATURES
"Look! We’re still trapped in METAL, where we were forced to go through that stupid photofeature last month! Fortunately, we of Slayer know the secret exit route from this mag ...OK, drop the pants, Hanneman!"
"Mein Gott! If zey can do it, vhy can't Krokus escape also from zis rag? Der pants, schnell!"
"Perhaps this slightly less embarrassing gambit will work for me!"
“Trap Nuclear Assault in METAL before we’ve even been honored with a major feature? No way!”
“Honest... no one in Suicidal Tendencies told John Connelly— or anyone in Nuclear Assault—of the arcane secret escape route!”
"The route a secret from Maiden?? Absurd!"
“Make the secret escape route involve another step next issue? Sure!"
“Damn! Must I beat knowledge of the route from John Connelly or shall Waysted be trapped in METAL for, lo, eternity??”
'We’ve had the pants dropped ever since that ‘Anthrax In Nassau’ nonsense in your otherwise-fine September issue!”
