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HEAVY METAL Must Be DESTROYED!

"I'm not a metallurgist—most of us aren't," admitted internationally acclaimed music critic Phil Donahue on a recent show, and for once he was right. Then he went back to the main subject of that day's program, which I think was about plugging the leaks in the clean urine black market.

May 1, 1987
Rick Johnson

HEAVY METAL Must Be DESTROYED!

Rick Johnson

"I'm not a metallurgist—most of us aren't," admitted internationally acclaimed music critic Phil Donahue on a recent show, and for once he was right. Then he went back to the main subject of that day's program, which I think was about plugging the leaks in the clean urine black market.

It's easy to blame the record labels and their corporate sponsors, but why bother? You can spit at capitalism all you want.

Go ahead—ptooey! Still, you know way down in the innermost Stomp Creek, Tennessee of your rock ’n’ rollin’ soul that if it wasn’t for the entrepreneurial lure of tall dollars, we’d all be standing in line to buy potatoes, and heavy metal would still be a silly phrase in an obscure novel.

Is there anything you can do to fight back? Glad you askedl

* Send all your major label heavy metal records to me in care of this magazine.

I will punish them by selling ’em to used record stores and investing all the money (after expenses, heh heh| in pole barn futures.HHHHH

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