DOG HORMONES REACH THE LONE STAR STATE!

Facial hair—can't live with it, can't live without it! We mean, ZZ Top hardly invented the stuff. There's a tradition to consider, after all! For example, how did we first know the Beatles were about to turn incredibly lousy? Facial hair on Sgt. Pepper! What gimmick did Frank Zappa supplant talent with to achieve notoriety? Facial hair! What the hell's wrong with that weirdo in the Oak Ridge Boys? Too much acid—uh, we mean, facial hair! And what growth on Jane Wiedlin's upper lip forces her to eternally hang out with wimps like Sparks? It ain't cranberries! Get the picture, little shavers? Fine! Now get these pictures...