COVERING THE COVERS
What would albums be without covers? Pretty scratchy, no doubt about it. Despite their obvious functional purpose, covers also serve to promote what's inside, are fun to look at, and a good place to put your beer so you don't get the table wet.
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COVERING THE COVERS
BLOODY MARY COVER OF THE YEAR:
Shot Of Love (Bob Dylan):: K-Tellism is nothing new in album art (e.g., Get Happy!!), but this is the hands-down Murine Masterpiece of 1981. Using colors even Donovan never sang about. the ever-amazing Dylan invoked Gaud-Almighty to push Shot Of Love. A must for record-buyers with mirrored walls, ceramic thimble collections, and life-size Nativity displays.
SEXIEST COVER OF THE YEAR:
Seven Year Ache (Rosanne Cash):: As always, many contenders in this category, which was spawned years ago by Trout Mask Replica Why does Ms. Cash's disc bring home the hot sauce? Three reasons: her low-cut profile. Greg Brady unisex-do, and eyes that follow you around the room just pleading for.,.um, something Maybe Cup O' Soup. Anyway, understatement always wins out here: Pot Benatar, please copy.
CHICAGO CUBS MEMORIAL AWARD FOR CONTINUITY:
Exit. . .Stage Left (Rush):: Once again Rush delivers a "truly exciting" album cover. It's getting pretty scary the way every one of their covers is interchangable with every other one, but their millions of fans wouldn't have it any other way, God bless 'em. Exit sort of defines the high-tech coyness that passes as album art nowdays: it might be interesting if you got so stoned you couldn't stand and didn't have objects like ashtrays and Foreigner 4 to look at. But you do, and you won't, so it isn't.
BEST FACE TO OCCUPY SPACE:
Trust (Elvis Costello):: Like the glutted sex market, faces show up on every other album you look at. Elvis gets the nod for matching a ridiculous title with an appropriate picture. Look at this cover no wonder this man is a star!
What would albums be without covers? Pretty scratchy, no doubt about it. Despite their obvious functional purpose, covers also serve to promote what's inside, are fun to look at, and a good place to put your beer so you don't get the table wet.
Here's a look at some of 1981 s best and not-so-best album covers. Since a full 50% of the awardees picture nothing remotely resembling human, astute observers will guess that the record industry is conspiring to hide the artists from the public. And about time, too.
BEST SEEMINGLY-MEANINGFUL ARTWORK:
Heaven Up Here (Echo & The Bunnymen):: What's going on in this picture? Wouldn't you like to be in this picture? What if those aren't birds, but actually upside-down fish??
"Art" still looms large on the LP market and Heaven Up Here mops up on any 1981 contenders. A perfect balance of shadow and light, statement and insinuation, and man and nature, this cleverly-shot cover seeps symbolism like a squeegee from Moby Dick. In a class with Rubber Soul, on the outside, anyway.
SPECIAL DAMN THE BUDGET” AWARD:
Foreigner 4:: Say what you will about their music. Foreigner does their album art-work only on double-coupon day. Going "on the record" for Reaganomics. Foreigner 4 is so sublimely cheap that it transcends common traffic signs as a real eye-catcher. Having gone double-platinum, thousands of copies will exist decades from now to calm future generations of overcrowded hens.
TOPS IN SIMULATED MOTION/BANDS THAT NO LONGER EXIST:
The Royal Albert Hall Concert (Creedence Clearwater Revival):: Nothing more than a clear shot of one of America's greatest bands. Notice the ostentatious backdrop, the elephantine logo, the crazy, show-biz threads. Bom to set trends, this cover catches CCR at the peak of the "New Bayouism” craze.
TOPS IN SIMULATED MOTION/BANDS STILL ABLE TO FOG A MIRROR:
Nine Tonight (Bob Seger & The Silver Bullet Band):: Conclusive evidence that rock success can make you invisible as well as rich! Oh well, it’s pretty tacky these days to actually picture people holding and or playing instruments right on an LP cover...1 mean, you might think they're a band or something. Nothing from '81 to match the London Calling hip-shot.
THE #1 ANSWER FROM OUR STUDIO AUDIENCE AWARD:
Grand Funk Live?:: 7h>s is more like it Good old graffiti, just when you thought we d pulled the plug on this particular graphical respirator.
Since this type of cover was a good idea exactly once, it's no wonder GF went for it. though. Notice how *he letters seem to go away from you, something the band hcs never quite managed to do. Well at least it's in English.
THE ABSOLUTELY BEST COVER OF THE YEAR:
King Of The Rood (Boxcar Willie):: I'll buy any LP that guarantees me 20 great tracks and puts a choo-choo on the cover to prove it Possibly he only album listed that actually looks like on album
BEST COVER PAINTED BY A LUNATIC:
Fiji' Warning (Van Ha'en Hpy, o*l cove; pointing? aren’t Hone bv Ujnqtics they only »yok ’hot way. Fair Waning s the work of a guy with. so>e real p-obfems though and he's not even in the band! N kidding, they sow 'his *h rrg >n some B‘ ‘tish hospital and nked .« sr much, well, suffi; e it to say that what - inside gove new hope to mental patient' everywhere.
IF IT LOOKS LIKE A COVER AND FEELS LIKE A COVER. THEN...?":
Ghost In The Machine (The Police):: Well you know the rest. Now maybe the polire figure you just can’t take the hieroglyphics out of hi-fi but e/o tly who is kidding whom? Plenty of dogs walk in wet cement mo'e meaningfully thon Ghost
