If there’s one thing I like less than other people’s telephone answering machines it’s getting muzak when I’m put on-hold. And if there’s anything I like less than muzak on hold it’s telephone operators telling me to have a nice day.

Until recently I was a dyed-in-the-wool telephone reactionary. One of the feW remaining individualists who enjoyed the silence of being on hold, aqd didn’t mind in the least if I called somebody and they weren’t home.

I say until recently, becausie, gulp, I’ve had to acquire a dreaded telephone answering machine apd become one of the pre-recorded.

Since everybody but shoe stores and newsstands sell telephone answering machines, my first problem was where to buy it. I’d set only two criteria: that it didn’t cost more than $79.95 and that it worked. Research indicated that I could spend up to $300 for one, but it seems to me that no telephone answering machine is worth more thain $79.95, no matter what. So I headed for the nearest electronics discount? house to see how the field was set up.