DRIVE-IN SATURADAY A Slice Of Life?

DRIVE_IN SATURADAY A Slice Of Life?

Edouard Dauphin

by

What do Night Of The Living Dead, The Rocky Horror Picture Show, and Pink Flamingos have in common? Besides being el trasho flicks, all three got new life by bejng revived for midnight shows at the Waverly—a Greenwich Village movie theatre where the films are as out of focus as the brains of the people in the audience.

Martin, a modern day vampire story set in a Pittsburgh suburb (don't ask!), is the newest of the late night Waverly wonders. Judging from the shrieks of the zombies in the theater and the frequency of vomiting in the lobby, it's one of the scariest and most revolting things to hit New York since the last Elvis Costello concert.

Now anyone who has ever visited Pittsburgh knows that city has no good excuse for existing and would be better off buried beneath four billion gallons of Wesson Oil. (Send your letters to Edouard—Ed.) Or dismantled and shipped in its entirety to Canada where dull and sterile cities are truly „ appreciated. Still, director George Romero likes the Iron City and continues to make films there. Naturally, they're horror films—just being in Pittsburgh is a horror film!

In Night Of The Living Dead, Romero gave us human entrails that looked like fettucini alfredo. Here he specializes in vein slashing. Makes sense—if I lived in Pittsburgh, I'd have cut my wrists a long time ago.

The film's hero, Martin, isn't your old-fashioned vampire, relying on charm or hypnotism to seduce his victims and fangs to draw their blood. Instead he overpowers them with a hypodermic needle, then severs their veins with a razor. Ain't modern technology wonderful?

Martin goes a bit far when it comes to wielding a razor If something contains blood and is moving, Martin will rip it open. Don't ask this sucker "How are you fixed for bladtes?"

Martin is played by a newcomer named John Amplas who resembles a young and still functioning Mick Jagger. Amplas seems to be in a deep trance for most of the movie; which was just fine at the Waverly since most of the audience was out cold, too. Must be that angel dust they've been sprinkling on the popcorn.

His first victim, cut to ribbons during, the opening credits, is a young girl traveling by train to New York. Martin slips on board the Amtrak special, jimmies open the lock on her compartment and does his bloody deed. Just as well—7the girl probably would have gotten mugged or something once she hit the Big Apple.

Arriving in Braddock, Pa., the Pittsburgh suburb, Martin is met by his uncle, an ancient codger with the colorful name of Tata Cuda. (Didn't he used to play bongos for Traffic?)

Portrayed by veteran (but still unknown) character actor Lincoln Maazel, Tata Cuda has obviously seen his share of Linda Blair movies. He decides the best medicine for Martin is instant exorcism, with a stake through the heart for dessert. One look at Tata cuda and Martin wishes he got off the train in Philadelphia—at least there he could have gotten bored to death.

Martin moves into the oldster's house where he makes the acquaintance of Tata Cuda's semipresentable daughter . To say this girl is plain is to be extravagantly gallant. Tata Cuda warns Martin to stay away from her, which is a little like telling David Bowie not to make goo goo eyes at Meat Loaf.

To satisfy his bloodlust , Martin ventures into nearby communities and quickly claims two victims. While slashing them to death, he makes love' to them. "Some day," he admits, "I'd like to doit while their eyes are open." But his method does have its advantages: your bed partner doesn't snore or steal the blankets.

As with most mass murderers these days, Martin is soon transformed into a media hero. He becomes a regular on an all-night radio phone-in program. The host, a poor man's Wolfman Jack (that's poor indeed), nicknames Martin the Count and urges him to provide grisly details of his murderous adventures, which he is reluctatit to do—at least until he can sign with the William Morris Agency.

The picture ends violently as Martin learns there are some chest pains that can't be cured by Ben Gay. The ads for Martin say: "See it with someone you're sure of." But I say: "See it with someone you hate—and bite them!"